sometimes we forget how to want
by ohmytheon
Summary: Cassian has been on a lot of missions before and done a lot of shady things. The second Jyn steps out onto the stage, however, he knows that nothing has prepared him for this, but he's not completely powerless.


**Author's Notes:** This accidentally got a little more serious than I intended since it was supposed to just be a fun excuse for smut, but this is a painful ship. Still, this is really just…kind of silly and here for a good time. I'm surprised I haven't seen a fic like this already, although I probably just missed it. This particular undercover trope is a necessity for all spy couples after all. Also, it got impossibly long.

 **Disclaimer:** Rogue One owns my soul, not the other way around.

* * *

 _sometimes we forget how to want_

* * *

It wasn't the first time that Cassian had been in an establishment like this. Some missions called for him to enter places he would've never otherwise stepped foot in, even going so far as having him pretend to enjoy it. He'd done his fair share of morally grey things for the Rebellion. As far as terrible things went, going to a strip club most certainly wasn't one of the worst. He just had never personally enjoyed them himself. Dark, loud, liquor-filled, and seedy, they did, however, make for great meeting places between informants and also drop offs.

When everyone was considered tainted, it made it much easier to blend in.

Still, Cassian hadn't been exactly thrilled when they'd been given this mission, Jyn even more so. After all, she was the one that would be doing most of the work. Cassian was there mainly as back up - to keep an eye on her and also make sure things went smoothly - while she would be in the thick of it. And it wasn't like she was comfortable with the role she was playing. He could still remember her growling furiously from behind the door when K-2 mentioned something about her wardrobe.

Not long after landing in the city, Cassian made himself a semi-regular at the club. He didn't have to wear an Imperial outfit this time, just the hint of one. An officer on leave, trying to enjoy a bit of nightlife before he was forced back to work. This particular city was known for that. Lower Imperial officers would come here, mingle with some of the very miscreants Stormtroopers harassed, and get into a little good ole fashioned debauchery. Practically everything was a go here. Behaving and following the rules made a person stand out here.

Jyn came after. At first, they made sure not to be at the club at the same time. Cassian was loathed to send her in without him there, but Bodhi would trickle in on those nights, probably nurse two drinks at the bar for as long as he could without attracting the attention of one of the employees. Bodhi always came back red-faced and twitchy, muttering that everything was fine before holing himself up in his ship. At least he talked. Jyn was completely silent about it, stone-faced with a buzz under her skin that vibrated danger if Cassian were to ask questions.

So he didn't. Things seemed to be going well without him. Their target, a high-ranked Imperial officer with quite a few nasty habits that he couldn't let go of, was a regular at the club. He went almost every other night. Cassian had crossed paths with him a few times, usually keeping his distance but sometimes only a few feet away. The man was grimy with loose, grabbing hands, a terrible grin, and a weakness for petite dark-haired women. At least it made him predictable.

Now that they were comfortably settled in their roles, it was time to make a move. Jyn was getting progressively angrier while Bodhi looked more miserable with every passing night. He sighed with relief when Cassian stepped out in his night clothes.

Jyn glanced at him once, her mouth as thin as possible, and darted her eyes away from him before he could connect with her. "I have to go. I should be there before you."

"Wait." Cassian didn't reach out to grab her arm, not like he wanted to, but she turned her body towards his almost on instinct anyways.. She was bundled up in a long jacket that she kept protectively wrapped around her body like it was armor. "It's almost over." He wished she would look up at him instead of staring determinedly at his chest so that she could see the faint smile on his face. "Just one more night."

Her lips twitched and she tightened her grip on her jacket, but said nothing else. Cassian watched her walk out the door, hating the way she held herself. It was for the Rebellion. All they did was for the Rebellion. But there were times when it felt like they gave too much of themselves away. He hadn't meant to drag her into his world; he hadn't asked her to sacrifice parts of herself like he did for the cause. When she had agreed to stay, half of him had filled with relief while the other half screamed at her to run.

 _You will lose yourself, piece by piece, if you do this._

He couldn't imagine what she had lost to this, but he would be with her at the end, as always.

"It doesn't upset her, not really," Bodhi piped up. "She just… She feels awkward. This, uh, isn't her."

"That's the point of going undercover," Cassian pointed out before leaving the room.

He slowly made his way through the city, careful of pickpockets but still casual enough to blend in with the crowd. Just another night on the town, the last one before being shipped off to another station. The club was a twenty minute walk from their rendezvous point, a few blocks from the center of the city. It was hazy with smoke, smelled of too much perfume and alcohol, dark with bright, colored lights that lit up the stage like the runway of a shuttle landing strip. Bad music, in his opinion, was played by a band that had clearly been drinking. But it made for the perfect place to do business in a way. This wasn't one of the worse joints at least.

Their target, Koren Byner, was sitting in the front row, up and close to the stage, a drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other. His Imperial uniform was undone at the top, his hat sitting carelessly on the table. He must've come here straight from duty. Cassian made his way forward, this time placing himself only three empty seats away. He usually stayed away from the stage, but he needed to be close by tonight. Of course Byner would make things difficult and uncomfortable.

Girls danced on the stage, all of them humanoid in some fashion. Men here liked things that spoke of the unknown and something different, but not too much. Cassian handed money away, each time thinking that Rebellion cash could be spent on something more important, but he couldn't sit right up front and act like a penny pincher. He didn't give as much money as Byner did. The man was as loose with his cash as he was with his hands. The girls, for their part, paid him attention, but Cassian could tell that they didn't enjoy it much. Money was money though, no matter who it was from. Byner did make them work for it though.

A new name was announced - Kaia - and Cassian's eyes snapped forward. Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw Byner sitting up eagerly in his seat, leaning forward so that his arms actually rested on the stage, but the moment the curtains drew back and another figure stepped out into the flashing red lights, Cassian stopped paying attention to Byner altogether.

Cassian had been on a lot of missions before, but nothing could have prepared him for Jyn sauntering on stage.

Even though she was still mostly clothed, his mouth went dry. He'd never seen her move like that before and he'd thought, foolishly so, that he'd memorized every way her hips could move and sway. Bodhi was right. It wasn't her. She had done well, becoming Kaia, a stranded girl trying to make quick money so that she could get a ride back to her home planet.

The makeup around her eyes was dark and smoky, making her green irises pop and her skin stand out strikingly. With every bit of clothing lost and tossed to the side, more of that pale skin was bared for everyone to see, but he was so zeroed in on her that it felt like he was the only one in the room. He'd touched that skin before, ran his hands down it, pressed his lips to it, slid his tongue across it - and yet somehow it looked brand new and he wanted more.

Cassian blinked when she tossed her shirt at him and tried to snap himself out of it. He was beginning to sound like another one of the lecherous customers here. But then she swayed to the music and slid down a wall halfway, her eyes finding his, and she smiled. If he hadn't been turned on before, he was now. Jyn had way of smiling that made a person feel like it was meant only for them, if only because she so rarely gave them away. She wasn't by any means the greatest dancer, her movements fluid in a way that spoke more of fighting and danger than dancing and alluring, but it was captivating in its own way.

It made a guy feel like he might get cut if he tried to get too close to her and still desperate the find out. He remembered feeling that way not too long ago without even seeing her dance in such a manner.

Carefully, Jyn slinked her way towards him as another girl took the stage. The dancers shared the floor on a constant rotation, but they didn't stop dancing once another appeared. Cassian was forced to lean back in his seat as she neared him, sliding off the stage and close to him. He opened his mouth, as if to question her, when she placed her hands on the back of his chair, and straddled him. Something between a grunt and a groan escaped him before he could stop himself as she ground down against him.

No, no, no, he could not do this. Cassian could do a lot of things - had done a lot of things - but he could not do this. How could she expect him to handle himself appropriately in this position? She was only wearing a matching black set of bra and panties now, barely anything separating her from him. There was no way that she would not able to tell how much she had affected him. In fact, judging from the little grin on her face as she moved against him, she definitely had an idea.

Without meaning to, Cassian's hands found their way to her sides, resting on the bare skin on her hips just above her underwear. Customers were allowed to touch back as long as the dancers didn't mind. And Jyn didn't seem to mind, not with the way she was pressed up against him. And then, with a wicked gleam in her eyes, she stepped back and spread his legs open.

Cassian started and licked his lips. "Ah, what are you– what are you doing?"

"Relax," Jyn purred in a strange accent as she slid down. Her hands moved down as well, gliding down his chest, over his thighs, and down his legs. All the blood drained from his head. As she slid back up, her little hands came dangerously close to touching his hardened length and then her chest followed, until she was back in his lap. This time, he didn't hesitate to grab her again and pulled her closer, so that her face rested against his shoulder. "Men always want something another man has. It'll make him hungrier."

Hell, it was making Cassian hungrier for more. He had to fight the urge to jerk his hip upwards, but he was not about to rut against her in public, no matter how seedy of a place this was. She would've laughed about it later. But make no mistake, she would be paying for this later. This had not been a part of the plan.

One of her bra straps had fallen off her shoulder down her arm. A voice in the back of his mind urged him to pull it down further, but he didn't dare make a move. It was taking all of his willpower as it was to not kiss her.

But then Jyn caught his line of sight and smiled at him and bit her lip, making him feel dizzy. She knew exactly what kind of effect that look had on him. He wanted to replace her teeth with his, worrying at the bottom of her lip, slipping his tongue into her mouth, kissing her without abandon. Damn her, damn her. She lowered her shoulders and the other bra strap slid down.

"Go ahead," she told him in a husky, tempting voice. Did she really want him to or was this just a part of the role? Normally, he was excellent at spotting the difference, especially with Jyn, but he was a little distracted at the moment. "You can touch me, if you like."

Pulling one shaky hand away from her, he hesitated briefly before pulling her bra straps back onto her shoulders. "I like a girl with a little mystery."

Jyn giggled, climbing nimbly off of his lap and making him miss her almost instantly. As quickly as she had come to him, she left, drifting away from him like smoke, her finger lingering under his chin for a moment before she sauntered away from him, towards Byner. The man was positively frothing at the sight of her. His face was an open page of desire, driven to a brink after seeing her with Cassian, and he was all too eager in reaching out to grab her as she began to dance with him.

Cassian swallowed the lump in his throat and told himself that he was not jealous. This was just a mission. This was just another role that would be discarded. It was for the Rebellion.

But Force be damned, he wanted to pull out a vibroblade and stab Byner right in the gut for the way that he was pawing at Jyn.

The easiest way to make someone want something was to give it to someone else. Cassian could curse himself. Was he that easy to manipulate or was it just her?

The asshole kept pulling at the rest of her clothing, trying to slide it off of her body so that he could see and feel more. He was greedy and none too gentle. Jyn would laugh, twisting out of his grip, before finally she leaned over to whisper something in his ear. Cassian's blood boiled just beneath the surface. His hands twitched at his side, so he reached for his drink to busy himself. Whatever Jyn had said, it must've pleased Byner greatly, as he leaned back and groaned in a way that almost made Cassian crush the glass in his hand.

With that done, Jyn moved on, her dark hair bouncing around her like a halo, and traipsed further into the room. Cassian did his best to keep a furtive eye on her without being conspicuous while Byner watched her like a hawk, his stare on her like a claim. Mine, his eyes said, she's mine.

Cassian wanted to pluck the man's eyes out. Jyn didn't belong to anyone.

It wasn't long before Jyn came back, an almost shy smile on her face. When she held out a hand, Byner took it quickly, pulling her close to him. She giggled uncharacteristically and tugged him to his feet. As she led him to one of the back rooms, she cast a look over her shoulder and winked at Cassian, as if to tell him that he was missing out on something, and then disappeared behind a door hidden in the dark shadows of a hallway.

After waiting a few minutes and watching another dancer, he stood up and made his way towards the bathroom. At the last minute, he ducked into the hallway instead and found the room that Jyn had gone in with Byner. He knocked on the door in a specific manner and then waited a beat before the door opened and he slipped inside unnoticed.

There was Jyn, still standing there in nothing but her underwear, looking slightly irritated. Back to normal then - or as normal as could be with what she was wearing. Byner was passed out on the bed, looking completely out of it, an empty tumbler glass on the floor below his hand that hung off the edge. When Cassian glanced back at Jyn, he noticed that her hair was disheveled and her makeup was slightly smeared, especially her lipstick.

Jyn caught him looking and huffed, folding her arms across her chest. "It took a minute before the sedative kicked in. This imbecile has a high tolerance."

No, Cassian was not going to stab an unconscious target. That would make things look very suspicious. But it was a tempting thought.

Instead, he said nothing and brought out the tools that they would need in order to finish the job. While she took his handprints and then fingerprints, he plucked Byner's eyelids open and took a quick retinal scan. They gathered some samples of his DNA and made a copy of this access card that he'd kept on him after coming here directly from work. Too eager to see that new dancer Kaia before she left.

Once their work was complete, Cassian slid the objects back into his jacket and stood up straight. He glanced back at Jyn, who was eyeing Byner like she wanted to strangle him. He knew that if he tried to apologize, she would be furious with him for it. No one had ever apologized to him for what he'd had to do for the Rebellion. What made her any different? He also knew that he could not admit to still being affected by her dancing earlier. It was the worst moment possible, but just thinking about it made him squirm.

"Jyn," was all he said instead, reaching out to touch her wrist, his voice too low, too strained.

She turned to face him. A thousand contradicting thoughts flooded into his mind. Desire. Sorrow. Anger. Longing. Concern. Want. Fear. They all blended into one terrible mess until he didn't know how he was supposed to feel or what to say, so he did what he'd always done before. He shut it down. He put all of those emotions in a box, locked it up, and hid it away. It was easier that way, especially with the way she was looking at him.

And yet he still wanted to pull her flush against him, crash his mouth against hers, and run his hands all over her until she was gasping under his touch.

Despicable, predictable idiot.

"I'll be okay," Jyn told him. And then she snorted and held up a wad of cash. "At least he prepaid. First time I've made more money on a mission than what was spent on it."

Cassian nodded his head stiffly and then exited the room. He went to the bar to order another drink while Jyn slipped out and spoke with her manager. The woman in charge of the girls actually laughed as she took her part of the cash and then sent Jyn along to the back. Jyn left first, out the back like all the other employees, while Cassian hung around for another thirty minutes. He was still there when Byner stumbled out of the room, his face red with embarrassment and looking a complete mess. Passed out on the girl of his dreams before he could do anything. How humiliating. It would be awhile before he showed his face here again.

After a while, Cassian left the club as well, winding his way through the city towards the rendezvous point. He always went a different route, some much longer than others, to make sure that he wasn't followed. It was hard to not make a straight beeline for the motel room tonight, but he forced himself to go slow, taking in the flashing lights and dank smells of the city. By the time he reached the room, Jyn had already been there for almost two hours. She was probably crawling up the walls by now wondering where he was and what was taking him so long.

Just as he suspected, the moment he walked inside, Jyn was on him. "What took you so long?" she demanded as she stormed towards him. There was fire in her eyes and a hard expression on her face. Ah, there was the Jyn Erso that he knew so well. "Where were you?"

"Don't worry," Cassian told her, an amused grin on his face. "I didn't stay to watch the other girls."

Jyn sneered and folded her arms across her chest, but kept her mouth shut. Likely she was still brimming with adrenaline from the night's events. She was a quick learner and even faster on her feet, but she wasn't the seasoned spy that Cassian was; she was still figuring out how to direct her energy after missions. She watched silently as he put everything that they had gathered in a bag that he stored in the closet. Honestly, he was surprised that she didn't demand more answers from him, but his quip had done the trick in quieting her.

When he finally turned to face her, they just looked at one another. Jyn's cheeks were still pink, though not from the makeup. Then he noticed that she was wearing a bathrobe and it clicked. She'd been so anxious about him taking so long that she hadn't even finished changing out of her wardrobe for the mission. Underneath that bathrobe was the same underwear set that she had been wearing when she'd teased him at the club. He took three steps towards her without even thinking, until she was right before him and had to tilt her chin up to continue looking him in the face.

There was questioning, hesitant look in her eyes when he held her face and kissed her as hard as he could.

For a brief second, Jyn stiffened, probably out of shock at his sudden action, but then she unfolded her arms and wrapped them around his neck instead, pulling him down to her. She opened her mouth to his, allowing him to deepen the kiss, and hummed pleasantly as his mouth worked against hers. He slid his hands from her face, down her neck, shoulder, and arms, until he could rest them on her waist again.

A part of him, the part that always thought to take things slow with her, draw it out, touch and taste her thoroughly, wanted to push her towards the bed. But then he pictured her on the dance floor again, the way she'd been moving, coordinated like she was in a fight, her hips, her hands, that smile that was a mixture between sneaky and shy - and that part of him faded into the background. All of his desire from earlier came roaring back to him, demanding to be heard, and this time, he didn't have to ignore it.

Instead he pushed her back against the wall and pinned her there with his body, hard enough to startle her into gasping but not hard enough to hurt her. She was a slippery thing and he knew how much she enjoyed wiggling away to tease him, but not this time. With a knee, he nudged her legs apart and moved to kiss her jaw and down her neck, sucking on the skin over her pulse point. It seemed to jitter underneath his lips. Another gasp escaped her, this one breathier, when he found a sensitive spot and she pulled at the back of his collar and the hair hanging down the nape of his neck.

The bathrobe came undone easily. All he had to do was tug on the belt and then slid his hands inside over the skin of her belly. She jumped under the cold touch of his hands, but then whimpered and pressed her center against his thigh when he moved to rove his fingers over her breasts. Even hidden by the bra, they were sensitive. He knew just how to coax her into wanting more by now.

Take your time, a distant voice told him. You have that ability now.

But no, that wasn't what he wanted. Jyn was usually the one that preferred things fast and rough. There were nights when she would pull him to bed like an animal in heat, leaving marks on his back that she tended to carefully in the morning. She would drag every moan and inch of desire out of him, like it was the only thing keeping her alive, like it was air, until she could finally breathe and rest easy lying next to him. She hadn't known what to make of his tenderness, his need to satisfy her, his desire to take care to map her out. He thought it had scared her at first. He hadn't even known that he'd wanted it like that until her.

Tonight though there was no gentleness. No gentle caresses, no delicate coaxing, no luxurious slow pace. Tonight he wanted all of her and he wanted her now. All his patience and self control had been spent at the club.

When he pulled away slightly, Jyn let out a protesting whine. He moved his way down quickly, kissing down her stomach and over her hip bone. She jerked in surprise when he roughly pulled down her underwear to her ankles, exposing her to him, and made a little yipping sound that he'd never heard before when he nipped the inside of one of her thighs. He gave her no warning before he licked up her slit and a jerky breath stuttered from her lips.

He couldn't stop himself from groaning at the smell of her, the taste of her, already so wet and wanting. It couldn't be from just their brief moments of kissing and him touching her. Had she gotten aroused back at the club just like him? All those breaths, the way she'd ground against him, her eyelids fluttering shut, the huskiness of her voice when she'd told him that he could touch her. He'd wanted to touch her. Force, it had been all he could do to not allow his hands to roam over her body, possessively, greedily.

The few things in life that he'd wanted before had been for the greater good, not of his own benefit, partly because it had been stamped out of him early on in his childhood and mostly because the Rebellion had been all that mattered after that. This though, Jyn, he felt so selfish with his want for her. He wanted her all to himself. He was forced to share a part of her with the Rebellion, but moments like these belonged to him. She only made herself vulnerable to him, only allowed herself to need him, only opened up to him – and he wanted it so bad.

She moaned above him, pushing her body flat against the wall. With her hands, she both tugged at his hair for more and tried to push him away, like it was too much and not enough at the same time. But he dug his fingers into the back of her thighs and her ass and would not relent. Even as he felt her muscles clenching, even as she cried out when he pulled one hand away from her thigh to pump two fingers up her center, even as words began to tumble out of her mouth, "Please, Cassian, oh, oh, shit, please," like she couldn't take it

He did not stop until she was shaking and crying out, pulling painfully at his hair and clawing at him. He licked at her, demanded more from her, until he was almost certain that she was close to sobbing and he'd never heard her like this before. It made him even hungrier. He'd had her before and she was his, in her own way, but still he wanted her like he'd been starved of her for years.

As he pulled away from her, she was shaking, her legs wobbling underneath her. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as he stood up. Her pupils were so blown wide that he could barely see the mossy green of her irises and she was breathing so heavily that her chest brushed against his. Her skin was flushed from her cheeks all the way down her neck. Normally, he would've given her time to recuperate, even if it didn't always seem to be on her mind when it was him. Perhaps a taste of her own medicine was what was needed after tonight's show.

While pressing his lips to hers again, the action instinctively pulling her towards him again, he quickly made work of his belt and pants. He could remember one of the first times they'd had sex and he'd been so clumsy, suddenly incapable of figuring out how to undo his pants, and she'd grinned against his lips. Endearing, she'd called it later. It had not felt that way at the time.

This time, he barely bothered shoving his pants or boxers down all the way. It wasn't like he was going to be moving around the room any time soon, not with her just where he wanted her. He slid his hands under her ass again and lifted her up, pinning her back against the wall, and then guided himself into her. She clung to him tightly, burying her face in the crook of his neck, and made a little noise when he pushed himself in all the way. She was so wet and inviting that there was hardly any resistance.

Holding her in place, he pumped in and out of her, not for a second going slow. She hit the wall every now and then, but didn't seem to mind as her moans mixed with his. "Jyn," he breathed, his mouth hovering over hers. Her eyes were closed and she gripped him tightly as he tirelessly pushed in and out of her. He kissed her, sloppy, her hair tangling in her face and mouth, but he didn't care. The feel of her around him, her muscles twitching, was enough to make him feel dizzy.

He didn't care about the strain on his arms. She was exactly in the right place at the right angle where he could bury himself deeply in her. He loved the noises she made every time he pushed himself harder into her, slamming her against the wall. Her nails dug into his shoulders, demanding even more from him, and he was all too willing to give it to her. Both of them were sweating and smelled of smoke from the club, but underneath that was the perfume she'd been wearing tonight, as intoxicating now as it was then.

"Touch yourself," he growled into her neck, biting her skin enough to leave a mark. "Now." She whimpered again, so unused to him being so commanding, needing it more than she'd expected probably. After all, she was used to him giving orders when they were on a mission or at the Rebel base, but not in the bedroom, certainly not like this. "I want to feel you."

He also knew that she would take it as a challenge. Him being the boss in a situation where she normally took control would drive her something fierce. One of her thin hands slipped in between them. The second she began to touch herself, she arched into him even more and moaned loudly enough for whoever was in the next room to hear. He didn't care. He could feel every time her walls clenched around him, seizing him for a moment before releasing him again. It took her out of rhythm, but again, he didn't care.

Both of them had learned early on how to get themselves off quickly and quietly, a necessity when the urge came after a while, and so it wasn't long before she'd brought herself to the peak. It drove him absolutely wild and somehow he managed to go even harder and faster. His own breaths had turned into ragged gasps as she bucked her hips against him and helpless pleas were whispered in his ear, her second orgasm rolling over her and him, He almost came right then and there, but held himself back at the last second.

He waited until she had come down from the orgasm, her muscles only spasming here and there, when he finally pulled out of her and set her down on the ground. This time, her legs were definitely weak and her knees buckled together. He didn't force her to stand for too long, pulling her away from the wall and pushing her towards the bed. As she tumbled backwards into it, bouncing on the mattress and laughing breathlessly, he shucked his shoes and stepped out of his pants and boxers. Definitely didn't need those anymore.

Crawling over her in the bed, Cassian leaned down to kiss her again, slowly, deliberately, like he usually did when they were in bed like this. She eased into the kiss, reaching out to touch him, but he snatched one of her wrists before she could do so. Sitting up slightly, he grabbed her other hand and held them above her head, making her look so very vulnerable to him. She blinked up at him, half surprise and half arousal. Her wrists were so thin; it was a wonder they'd found binders to fit them all that time ago. He held them with one hand while he pushed himself inside of her again. She immediately canted her hips up to meet him.

It wouldn't be long now. Not with the way she was looking up at him, so trusting. She was breathless, her skin flushed with adrenaline and arousal. His eyes never left hers and it was almost too much for him. He'd looked into plenty of people's eyes while lying straight to their faces, but something like this, something so honest, had always been difficult for him to imagine. She pulled it out of him though, piece by piece, until he remembered. He pumped in and out of her fast and hard until he could barely breathe himself.

And then her muscles clenched around him again and she pleaded with a single word, "Cassian," and his entire world went white for just a moment. He fell forward, catching himself on his forearm, and buried his face into the crook of her neck, just as she had done with him, as he came, his movements staggering and out of pace. He tilted his head to kiss her desperately, on the neck, jaw, cheek, and then her lips, swallowing up everything left unsaid between them.

When he finally came down, his lips were still on hers, but neither of them were moving, just breathing, as if their lungs trying to catch up with their bodies. Both of their eyes were closed. He leaned his forehead against hers, relishing the feel of her chest haphazardly brushing up against his. He jerked when her muscles spasmed around him and then kissed her almost chastely as he pulled himself out of her. Letting go of her wrists, he rolled off of her and flopped down next to her in bed. He took in a gulp of air and then sighed.

"Where in the hell did that come from?" Jyn asked, still sounding desperate for air though not angry. He could hear how content she was underlining her words. She was fierce with everything in her life, including happiness. He loved that about her.

Chuckling, Cassian turned onto his side so that he could nuzzle into her, his stubble rubbing against the smooth skin of her neck. "You were very rude during the mission."

"You didn't enjoy it?"

Cassian pulled his head back so that he could look at her and found her already looking at him. "I'm fairly certain I just proved that I did." He shrugged. "Maybe a little too much. You were…distracting."

Jyn bit her lip. "It wasn't… It wasn't me."

"I know," Cassian told her, "but this was. And you're always maddening so that was definitely you."

"Maybe you're just easy to rile up," Jyn pointed out, a faint grin on her face.

"No," Cassian said as he threw an arm around her and pulled her close to him, "it's just you. Always you."

She had been frustrating and difficult from day one, even before he'd met her, back when he'd read her file and learned that they would have to break her out of a Wobani labor prison camp. It only made sense that she would be just as frustrating now, just in a different, much more pleasurable way. He wouldn't have her any other way, if he was being honest.


End file.
